HOW TO: open a new text post and type letters a-z into the tags and take your favorite tag it suggests and post it out of context. this only works if you use tags as obsessive conversational add-ons like me, and if your computer saves the tags you’ve used before.
WHAT YOU COME UP WITH SHOULD BE SOME SORT OF REFLECTION OF YOUR CHARACTER. ENJOY.
A: "are you married yet?" (close seconds: "and now i have a headache" "absolute perfection") B: ”but with pants” (“brb crying”) C: ”congratulations on your face” D: "don’t make me cut a bitch" ("DAMN RIGHT YOU LOOK FIERCE IN IT" "did someone shrink that girl’s larynx?") E: ”ENTERTAIN ME INTERNET.” (“epitome of class” “except you have to let me know which gays”) F: "flashbacks like whoa" ("FUCKING MELVIN") G: ”GAH HAIR ALWAYS” (“gpoy”) H: "hopefully i will actually get married someday" ("HE SAID YAWEH INSTEAD OF YEAH WAY.") I: "i’m like a unicorn!!" ("it’s nonny time" "i want to go to there") (This one was hard, I have a billion tags that start with ‘i’.) J: ”just hitting the nail on the head over here” K: "kthxgiving" L: ”lmao why did he have to sneak into frat parties!?” (“let me give my reasons!!”) M: ”MAAAAAAARGARITAS AT THE MIDNIGHT BUFFET!” (“my most of me!” “maybe one of my favorite characters of all time”) N: ”nikki has a lot of feelings” (“not sure how i feel about it” “nikki liveblogs”) O: ”oh my god.” (also any and all variations of “oh my god”. cause there were a LOT) P: ”partly cause i don’t know how to pronounce it…” Q: ”quote” R: ”rodgers and hammerstein i strongly dislike you” S: ”SLAP THE BUTCHER!” (“so hard right now” “spirit animal”) T: ”this is Ricki saying no matter how hard you try you’ll never be as good as me” (“this will never not be funny” “this is how you master the art of camouflage” “this was a pointless narrative”) (again, this one had A LOT) U: ”ughhhhhhh” (and all variations thereof) V: ”VICKY VICKUHS” W: ”wow that was a lot of run-ons” (“what is happening to my life?” “winona ryder in a hundred years”) X: [none] Y: ”yes i’m watching it a third time” (also a lot of variations on the word “yesssssssss”) Z: ”ZEFRONNNNNN”
Finally removing all the shit from your room that has piled on the floor and you say ‘oh look I put the underwear in the underwear DRAWER’ and then thinking you have accomplished something like not having your room look like a crime scene. Seriously, your room looks like a crime scene where Horatio from CSI is going to be all ‘looks like this pile of laundry is a pile of DEAD GIRL’ and then removes his glasses as the Who screams
The moment when the waitress is like ‘oh here is your food’ and you have a fresh pile of burger fries on your place and you smell the delicious aroma of the food before you dive into it like a cow of the sea
Warm towels. Oh no, this isn’t just a REGULAR towel this is a WARM HOT towel and it smells like the creepy Downy bear isn’t going to stab your eyes out, he’s going to grin at you with this field scented towel now
Paying your bills on time and realizing you have enough money to buy a sandwich or even live another day in a city that charges you fifty bucks for breathing
When you try a dress on in the dressing room with the unforgiving florescent lights and it’s like ‘oh great, when did my body turn into Rihanna I’m going to just shake my ass all over this dressing room now’
having a sibling moment because they’ve seen you at your absolute worst and your best and you can punch them in the head and they probably won’t sue you
The late night text message from exactly who you want to hear from
A kiss from two characters on a TV show who you have wanted to see kiss for SO LONG and there they are just making out to some Sia music or something and you’re like ‘oh boy my life is boring but at least these two fake people are happy’
Liking somebody before they do anything to destroy your heart
When the cute dog on the street corner doesn’t bite your hand when you try and pet it like the ravaged Cujo you know it really is
Drunk making out. Oh come on, it’s great! Sure, you’ll wake up in the morning and hate all that has lead up to this moment in your life, but fuck it you don’t wear heels for your health!
Turning the radio on and it’s the same song you love what am I PSYCHIC OF THE RADIO
Friends that are just the best people, not even people you want to dry hump or make out with, they’re just awesome people you are lucky to have in your life NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT SEX OKAY
Turning off your phone for a day
Waking up an hour before your alarm goes off and you get to roll around
Breakfast sandwiches, the goddess of all food, the food that kisses your hangover softly away
That one memory of that one best kiss ever, the one with all the trees and the ambience and shit and it reminds you of how old people must feel during “Everybody Loves Raymond”
When your mom buys you lunch so you are allowed to get the soft shell crab BLT or something else stupidly expensive and you just wear your casual but appropriate button-down and grin like a madman
A good pen, usually a gel pen
When somebody fights on the street and you get to watch the WHOLE THING GO DOWN and you’re like ‘oh shit!’ and text all your friends
Realizing you will never be Snookie from Jersey Shore, even though you sometimes want to wear those little dresses she wears because you suspect they might flatter your shoulders
The first sunny day after a whole lot of rain, if you want to take that as a metaphor you can you weirdo
Reading poetry that doesn’t sound like a bowl of mush and a an overly heavy Bukowski influence
Actually, the smell of all books
Finding money in your shorts, because you never wash your shorts and this is exactly why THIS IS EXACTLY WHY IT IS FOR THIS QUARTER
playing with little kids who don’t tattle like the little shits they can be because some kids tattle and they really suck, but these kids just let you play with their toys and you pretend like you don’t really want to dress up this Polly Pocket but you so do!
making a little fort in your room by preparing a cup of tea with whiskey and a handful of chips and a movie you really want to watch, yeah you might never leave I don’t care let them find your carcass this is ME TIME
any time you exhibit some form of self-control! Miracles!
Whenever Mean Girls is on TV and you get to spend the whole day being like ‘oh shit why did I ever do anything else but watch Janis Ian be so incredibly awesome in this cinematic masterpiece’
getting into somebody’s car and driving somebody really far and just singing really stupid songs like the Spice Girls and just whipping your dumb little hand out the window even though your mom told you the story of how that chops people’s hands off
Arrested Development on DVD and Jason Bateman being the perfect man for you in all seasons
Those days you feel absolutely happy and optimistic for no fucking reason at all
When your grandma slips money in your pocket and you use that money to buy all the booze but tell her it’s for a BARBIE
remembering how stupid you were in high school and how you might not be that lame anymore, or at least not sing a capella and wear creepy weird denim skirts
Doing something nice for somebody and realize you’re not just a shitty grumpy crab living at the bottom of the sea
Any and all vacations, because saying ‘fuck it’ and getting a tan is the healthiest thing a crazy person like you can do
A fresh piece of paper
Buying a new pair of boots
REVENGE SERVED HOT OR COLD
Easy Mac. I mean, come on. That is the perfect food and you just shut the fuck up and you eat that delicious mess
When your hair doesn’t look like somebody put a helmet around your head all day and said ‘oh good let’s just frizz this bitch up because you look great with cowlicks’
When you make somebody genuinely laugh at something you said and you smile like ‘yeah, I’m fucking hilarious I know that’
A high five that turns out pretty well, even though high fives kind of suck
A new razor for shaving your legs and it’ll be so nice and smooth and maybe you’ll get your shit together and moisturize
Telling somebody how you genuinely feel about them and they don’t shove a stick up your ass and throw you off a river bend
Taking a cab for once
Disney movies because if you don’t like that you don’t have a soul to stand on
A Thursday night on a week you know the weekend is packed full of good shit
Being happy. Just being fucking happy because there is so much awesome stuff in the world and you’re not going to be a crappy sad sack who says ” I HATE EVERYTHING” for once in your life
“May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you’re wonderful, and don’t forget to make some art — write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.”—Neil Gaiman (via fuckyeahhappy)
I saw your big list of things to do in 1,001 days and I just wanted to say that I think it's super duper awesome to do something like that. I just might make one of my own. ;)
Do it! I started that one 2 years ago (as of tomorrow) and it’s officially done sometime in Sept. of 2012. My advice would be to not put anything on it that’s like “blah blah every day" because as soon as you forget one day, you’ve failed that goal, haha. But I loved going through and realizing how many things I’ve finished! I can’t wait to do a new one when that one’s done. =]
I started this list (of 101 Things to Do in 1,001 Days) on 1/1/10. The crossed-out goals have been reached, and the italicized goals will most likely have to be revised.
1. Put 101 things on this list. 2. Travel outside the Midwest. 3. Stretch every day. 4. Conduct a choir. 5. Finish a whole song. 6. Improve on piano. 7. Get to know Kim better. 8. Get to know Gina better. 9. Record a video once a week. 10. Keep in touch with Kelsey. 11. Get a job. 12. Go ice skating. 13. See the lights downtown. 14. See a Broadway in Chicago musical. 15. Drink more water. 16. Work out twice a week. 17. Splurge on a piece of clothing. 18. Record an original song. 19. Learn to work iMovie. 20. Lose 10 pounds. 21. Party on my 21st birthday. 22. Get rid of my exercise-induced asthma. 23. Eat healthier. 24. Treat my sisters to dinner and a movie. 25. Finish a choral arrangement. 26. Stop hating cardio. 27. Take a road trip. 28. Go to the Sears Tower Skydeck. 29. Learn a new instrument. 30. Make a new friend. 31. Spend a holiday with my family. 32. Spend a holiday with friends. 33. Have a conversation with a stranger. 34. Babysit Jack. 35. Spend the night/weekend at U of I. 36. Read 25 books (WHOLE books). 37. Buy a skirt. 38. Practice ukulele. 39. Play uke in front of people. 40. Get into Valpo. 41. Finish a Sudoku book. 42. Own a cactus. 43. Keep a plant alive long enough to flower. 44. Be kissed. 45. Wear tights as part of an outfit. 46. Light sparklers. 47. Set off fireworks. 48. Ride on a motorcycle. 49. Go to the beach. 50. Write a song for someone. 51. Own a digital SLR. 52. Go to an amusement park. 53. See a movie alone. 54. Go to a party. 55. See a live concert. 56. Stay up to watch the sun rise. 57. Read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. 58. Finish everything on this list even if it takes more than 1,001 days. 59. Use a coupon. 60. Pick up knitting again. 61. Live somewhere “off-campus” (not a dorm). 62. Get a haircut I like. 63. Update tumblr regularly. Oh past self, if only you knew… 64. Go grocery shopping for myself. 65. Get professional pictures taken. 66. But one of the books on my list. 67. Read a “literary classic”. 68. Go on a date. 69. Take a long bike ride. 70. See my sister graduate high school. 71. Keep my toenails painted. 72. Start and finish Project 365. 73. Buy a new winter coat. 74. Decorate a room. 75. Get pictures printed/framed. 76. Wear jewelry regularly. 77. Be able to accompany myself singing on piano or ukulele. 78. Get my spoon ring cleaned. 79. Take a pilates class. 80. Take a dance class. 81. Have a picnic/eat outside. 82. Fly a kite. 83. Make a music video for an existing song. 84. Make a music video for an original song. 85. Make a homemade gift for someone’s birthday. 86. Keep in touch with Otterfriends. 87. Reconnect with an old friend. 88. Make up a handshake. 89. Bake from scratch. 90. Have a dance party. 91. Send a submission to PostSecret. 92. Stop swearing for no reason. 93. Send snail mail for fun. 94. Acquire a pen pal. 95. Ride on a boat. 96. Study Italian. 97. Jump on a trampoline. 98. Write a short story. 99. Save money for a big purchase. 100. Volunteer. 101. Make a new 101 list when I finish all the items on this one.